AI Recapper's Retreat

The Retreat spawns from the Television Without Pity American Idol Forum. Primarily for your longer form recaps, a place outside of the flow of the crazy episode threads. This way we can enjoy/comment/encourage/rationalize these long posts more easily. We spend the time on them, here's another spot for them to have 'life'. Not a forum replacement but a sub-set: Post there, paste here! Or more? We'll see. Oh, and NO SPOILERS! Welcome back for a new year of soul crushing pimping of Chosen Ones. -WS

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Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Coming Soon From A Hayloft Near You...
by Swoopin

Awww, isn't it nice that Ryan Sprinkles has now put a jacket on over his t-shirt two weeks in a row for "ladies night." How gentlemanly of him.

My overall reaction to this? Can't we just keep all the guys? I'd much rather be bored to tears by David Brown then endure something like this again, and I likecountry music.

Aloha: I thought the clothes were good. The rest--man she hit some goddawful notes in there, and her attitude bugs me. Her lower register isn't all that great and when she goes for power she sounds tinny. Not doing it for me.

Then we have the Carrie Overpimp Interview, where she explains that the girls were all really enjoying themselves last night. Here's your hoop Carrie, jump through it. *whack* Good girl.

[Lindsey: I like the country sound on her, and she had more energy than last week, so she gets props for improving, but I thought the performance was really flat. The vocals were fine--not awesome, but fine. I wish she'd dress better. She's too pretty to wear those unflattering tops.

Jessica: I thought she did this better than DiBot did last year, even though her vocals are rougher, mainly because it sounded like she actually got the point of the song, and I liked that she tried to build it vocally. She missed the power note, but on a bad night, this sounded damned good by the end.

Mickles the Drag Queen: is channelling Young Babs tonight, and with her hair pulled back you can even see some resemblance around the eyes. Honestly? I can't stand her when she's on her schtick, but I thought she did a decent enough job with a challenging song. I think the song's too old for her, and she honks on the low notes and goes flat, and her voice has this really bizarre tone that's not quite nasal but I don't know what it is--a weird timbre. Or something. I will say this much--she's got charisma. I found it hard not to watch her tonight.

The band is way too loud tonight--accident? You be the judge.

Celena: When she said it wasn't "about the fame" I'm all liar liar pants on fire because you know it is. I thought she was off key in spots (but who can tell with that damned loud band? Simon had a point) and she is fine vocally--her voice is pleasant when it's on key, and she seems "nice." But nice isn't a compliment in my book. It usually means no one can think up a better adjective to describe you, and that's her problem.

Robot Idol! Isn't that what I'm watching?

Nadia: Picks, of all the bizarre song choices, Macca's "My Love". First of all, that's like the worst Paul McCartney song ever. And I think this is not a good choice for her, even though she deals with it okay. But I want more wailing on the "who-ohs" and her lack of range is obvious with this. But Simon is pracitically parroting what's going through my head: "okay, that was interesting and weird, and don't do it again." Uhm, yeah.

Paula is now advising people to marry a risk. Whatever.

Amanda: Not this AGAIN. I thought she was sharp, but again, the BAND is clearly wanting its own phone line and trying to line up some votes by drowning out everyone. I don't care what Simon thinks, I thought her voice was too weak for this song and that it was really kareoke. Not nearly enough attitude while she was singing it. I never think this is a good choice--it's too hard to spit the words out and still perform. And I'm cracking up because there's this guy behind her in the audience who stands up when he's prompted to clap, but he is like the most unenthusiastic clapper ever except for Carrie.

Janay: Okay, I confess I've got a weak spot for this song. And I'm starting to worry because Paula is now whispering in my ear with her "disconnected" comment. Janay hasn't got nearly enough sass and spunk to sing this, she's overenunciating odd things like shoPPING SPRee, and she can't keep up with a pretty basic rhythm--she's breathless and then shaky and off-key when she actually has to sing. And this song is way too old for her.

Carrie: See "Miss Innocent" wink at the camera and slap her ass through "Piece of my Heart," which is just wrong, wrong, wrong. And she's working the Degarmo Patented Pageant Arms! Aaaahhhh! And smiling when she's singing about someone ripping her heart into pieces. I want to plunge a spork into my eyes. This is a huge, huge mistake to pick this song too because Melissa Etheridge just tore it to pieces at the Grammy awards, too, bless her bald head. Just no. And I swear to Roman she had no idea who Janis Joplin was. I wept, the Baby Jesus wept, and somewhere in a grave, Janis Joplin would weep if she could.

Vonzelle: Is it now Alicia Keyes night? I really like this song, and I thought she got a little too screamy and had some weird ass phrasing, but pass. On a terrible night, this sounded like a work of art in a lot of ways. And she looked awesome.

Out tomorrow? Well, hell, beats me. Easier to say who should get to try again: Vonzelle, Jessica, Mickles, Nadia, Carrie. But these girls better step it up or the top six will all be guys. Not that I'd mind that.

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Blogger Swoopin sez:

Well fer crissakes, I tried to fix my html tags and it ate my edit and won't let me do it again. Sorry readers!

Blogger Wandering Snark sez:

Somethin bee-zarre is afoot... I'll check it out.

Blogger Wandering Snark sez:

Wierd... the bold was carrying on through to the rest of the page too! It keeps doin that it's going to end up liVIN in VAN doWn by the riVEr (the previous was written following Janaybonics)

Anyhow, all seems to be cool. I bolded your names fer ya :-)

Blogger Swoopin sez:

Aww, Snarky, thanks. I figured out why it didn't bold them to begin with--I copied off my hard copy instead of the TWOP page because I had to edit what I originally wrote for length. Then when I tried to edit the tags back, it ate my edit. Must've been feeling peckish.

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