AI Recapper's Retreat

The Retreat spawns from the Television Without Pity American Idol Forum. Primarily for your longer form recaps, a place outside of the flow of the crazy episode threads. This way we can enjoy/comment/encourage/rationalize these long posts more easily. We spend the time on them, here's another spot for them to have 'life'. Not a forum replacement but a sub-set: Post there, paste here! Or more? We'll see. Oh, and NO SPOILERS! Welcome back for a new year of soul crushing pimping of Chosen Ones. -WS

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Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Bo: 2, Nadia: 1
by spacecitymarc

Lackluster evening all around. I blame the snowstorm.

Aloha Mischaux takes the opportunity in her clip to tell us how she really likes chicken. Terrific use of the ten seconds you have to let America know a little bit about you, Aloha. She sings "You Don't Know My Name," working her own name into the lyrics and then just tanks on the head voice parts. Did not like that at all.

Lindsay Cardinale pulls a switchup to sing some fast, horrible country song. She's actually quite good on the first uptempo number we've heard from her, though she lacks a bit of power here and there and the presentation is so cheesy that you could cater a cocktail party with it. But she's pulling it out, vocally, rather than feeling it up, chestally. I still like her, and she's still pretty.

Jessica Sierra, who I've just realized kinda looks like Alison Krauss mixed with Rosanne Cash, sings a mid-tempo country tune, and she's stronger in her lower range than Lindsay. She loses her last note completely, but she's pretty good otherwise. I'm starting to get kind of a Tift Merritt vibe from her. Simon lies that she has delivered the best female vocal so far, but I do like her.

Mikalah Gordon sings "God Bless The Child" with no control, so she's all over the place. She's not the trainwreck that we desperately want from her at this point, but it's just bland and holy God nasal. Bad tone, bad control, bad presence. How is she still here?

Celena Rae does a big ballad, which is pretty ballsy of her, considering everything that was said last week about how boring the balladeeresses were. She's actually not bad, but she would've had to have been spectacular to make said criticisms irrelevant. When Simon tells her that there's a thin line between being a pop star and singing in a hotel, a simple question occurs to me: what do the backing vocalists have to say about that?

Nadia Turner sings "My Love," one of the worst songs that Paul McCartney ever wrote, and her version consists almost entirely of the part without actual words. It was a good vocal, but she gave herself absolutely nothing to work with. Terrible followup to a slam-dunk performance last week. Score is now Bo: 2, Nadia: 1.

Amanda Avila wears a top from the Lindsay Cardinale collection as she sings "Turn The Beat Around" and she's not – and it chills me to the bone to say this – as good as Diana DeGarmo. Now that's a sobering thought. Paula says it was the perfect song for her, so I'm guessing that she recognizes that Amanda is awful, since that's the only way that that makes any sense.

Janay Castine isn't as terrified this week as she sings "Oops! (Hit 'Em Up Style)," which is a good fit for the quality of her voice, but she's very wobbly and doesn't have the power she really needs for it, disregarding the fact that the lyrics are pretty inappropriate for a 16-year old. Oh, and she works Paula's and Mikalah's names into the song, and this trend must stop. NOW. I find myself in complete agreement with Simon that she's too young but will probably be very good in a few years. But this is what happens when you lower the eligibility age to 16, assholes. You made your own bed, now lie in it, 19E.

Carrie Underwood countrifies "Piece Of My Heart," which spacecityroommate refers to as "another song you can't sing unless you smoke six packs of cigarettes a day." I'm more generous in my appraisal, as I think she's good, but she has no spark. Simon is, again and shockingly, totally right when he says that it's reminiscent of a local cover band. In the meantime, let's all make special note of the fact that the prechorus already contains four "come on!"s preloaded for ready use.

Vonzell Solomon finishes a fairly uneventful evening with a very nice "If I Ain't Got You." She is much better than last week, and I think that this might be more her bag than uptempo stuff like "Heat Wave."

Leave. Leave now: Amanda, Mikalah (alternate: Aloha)

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